[LBD Video #72] The Tree Remembers What the Ax Forgets
May 9, 2021 | By Karyn Kulenovic
I came across this quote the other day:
"The tree remembers what the ax forgets." ~ African Proverb
We've all picked up beliefs from past events in which we felt hurt or misunderstood by others.
Whether it was intentional or unintentional, we've developed beliefs about ourselves and the world because of those painful moments.
The problem is...
Unless you heal that hurt, there's a part of you still living from the past - it's like something in you shifted in that moment, and it's never been the same since. You may find that you're still protecting yourself and anticipating more hurt even when the event is long over. It's like your unconscious mind continues to OVERCORRECT and make meaning out of totally unrelated events. Thus, perpetuating the negative cycle.
It can be frustrating and disheartening.
Rest assured that
It's not your fault.
It's not permanent.
You are designed this way to survive.
However, it's important to know that when you are in survival mode, you're also protecting yourself from the goodness that is truly MEANT for you in this life. When the injured part of us "overcorrects," the fear-based energy manifests as thoughts and choices that keep you small.
In order to create next-level change,
you must choose to anticipate positive next-level outcomes for yourself.
But FIRST and foremost,
You must allow yourself to HEAL.
In Neuro Linguistic Programming we call this "Release Work." It's when we support the client to LET GO of the past negative emotions, limiting beliefs, and internal conflicts that have been weighing them down. This prevents them from cluttering up their future with more of what they don't want. This first step of Release Work is crucial to being able to build your life on a fresh new foundation. It's not about trying to change your history; rather it's learning to honor its role in your life and restructuring your experience of it. This allows you to move forward with CONFIDENCE and a genuine sense of HAPPINESS.
Many years ago, I used to have this fantasy that the people who hurt me would someday truly grasp how profoundly their actions had impacted my life. There are storylines I'd play out in my mind. Eventually, I realized that my longing was coming from a smaller part of me that actually needed to focus inward to heal. I also realized that when I looked backwards, I would manifest the same disempowerment I really wanted to put behind me.
So I stopped waiting for others' epiphanies and apologis (that weren't likely to occur).
I stopped imagining from a place of victimhood.
I forgave and released those characters in my past--
Then I started to harness my own power to grow and transform from within.
That's when I began to untangle the lifelong cycles of powerlessness and victimhood, the stories I had believed for so long. Having been a childhood survivor of sexual, emotional and physical abuse, there were obvious reasons why my younger self had built walls of protection and saw herself and that world a certain way. Those painful moments had imprinted my unconscious mind with emotions and experiences I had never wanted. They are what set up the negative cycles in the first place. It was never my fault - and it was up to me to DECIDE it was time for me to write a new story.
"The tree remembers, the ax forgets."
I will never forget the trials of my past
nor the "axes" in my life who may never truly understand or care--
I don't need to be saved or understood by others to prove I'm worthy.
I know my strength and am at peace having risen above the pain of my past.
Today my dreams are guided by the desires of my heart
and that is always more than enough.
Once I focused on my own journey of healing,
growth and empowerment, it's been UP ever since!
No matter what you've endured in life,
your TRUE power always lies within.
If you can release yourself from the chains of your past
and understand that your past does NOT have to determine your direction today and tomorrow,
You are more than halfway there.
And remember, healing can take many forms.
Trust where you feel guided to go and then follow through.
Your future self is already there.
P.S. Please forward this message to anyone you feel would benefit from it. Thank you for sharing!